Mistakes and Failure: 6 Tips for Leveraging Them to Your Advantage

Alexander Pope once said “To err is human.” If we are honest with ourselves, we know this is true. I’ve made my share of mistakes and I know that I have hundreds more left in me. However, it seems that our culture - both at work and at home - have so heavily stigmatized being wrong or failing or making a mistake, that people are now either too afraid to take risks or are afraid to admit when that have made a mistake. 

What does this look like in your house with your significant other and/or children? What about at work? Is it okay to make a mistake? I think we’ve all worked for that boss or supervisor who found their pleasure from making an example of anyone who made a mistake. I remember this most in baseball when I was in high school. It was as if the coach was waiting for us to swing at a bad pitch or boot a ground ball. He had a couple of funny yet humiliating sayings. When it was a bad throw, it was “million dollar play and a dime throw.” When it was a particularly bad mistake, he would tell us to "join the circus.” 

Don't worry! Mistakes are an important part of the learning process.

This kind of "playful" mockery can actually cause damage further down the line if aimed at the wrong person in the wrong point in his or her life. Luckily, I was able to brush these comments off, but some of my peers weren't so lucky and either quit the team or ended up playing the game safer, not taking any risks that would ultimately have shaped them into better players.

I want to encourage you, regardless of any criticism you've faced in your past, to take risk and not be afraid of making a mistake. What would it look like at home or at work if you created a culture where it was okay to make mistakes, as long as you promised to identify, analyze, and learn from them? Here are some tips to help you create that culture:

1. Recognize that effective, innovative thinkers are necessarily going to make mistakes. That's how these thinkers become great!
2. Don’t feel bad about your mistakes or those of others ... Love them and learn from them!
3. Observe the patterns of your mistakes and see if they are a product of weaknesses. Then think about what you can do to use your weaknesses to your advantage or to teach yourself something new.
4. Never feel bad about your weaknesses or those of others. We all have them!
5. Don’t worry about trying to look good; instead focus on achieving your goals.
6. Move beyond blame vs. credit and focus on accurate vs inaccurate.

How we respond to our mistakes and the mistakes of others is something that we have the power to change. We all talk to ourselves all day, everyday, and it’s important that we reflect and capture what that conversation looks like. It’s the story we tell ourselves about our mistakes, failures, and weaknesses that conditions our response to them. Change your narrative and embrace your humanity! Your emotional and psychological health will thank you, and your work may just improve too.